The right name?
I noticed Cigar Aficionado magazine on the rack today, the cover photo personality staring at me with an air of smugness, the hefty cover price, and it struck me.....shouldn't the proper name be Pompous Asshole Magazine? Or how about just coming out and naming it for what it's really saying: "I'm Over-Compensating for My Tiny Dick"?

Duct Tape Zen
Yo quiero duct tape!
But which to buy? There are just so many to choose from! Never fear, the font of knowledge Backpacker Magazine comes to the rescue with a review!

And now you can not only duct tape your home, you can duct tape yourself and look good doing it!

Eating Disorder?
Now here's a sport we can all heartily endorse. According to the International Federation of Competitive Eating, Eric "Badlands" Booker became the "finest competitive eater in America" on 27 Jan 03. On that date he consumed 21 oversized matzo balls in 5 minutes to establish a new world record. Eric is in fine company, having beaten previous record holders such as Ed "Cookie" Jarvis, who consumed 21 cannoli in a mere 6 minutes and Crazy Legs Conti who slurped down 168 oysters in 10 minutes. Check the records page for other notables like Oleg Zhornitskiy, downing four 32-ounce bowls of mayonaise in 8 minutes or former world champ Don Lerman. Don managed to eat seven quarter pound sticks of salted butter in five minutes. We can only assume that these guys were regular for weeks afterward.

But always remember:

Safety is the first consideration in any sport, and the IFOCE insists that all competitive eating matches take place in a controlled environment with the proper safety measures in place. Speed eating is not a sport for the home.